Personal Reflection

1. This integrity lark can be a pain sometimes. I have been asked to be a God Father to a new born in the family and I have to ask for time to think about it. Why? Simple, I don't believe in God and although it is only a few words that I have to say in the church it still doesn't fit with where I am with regards to living by my values. There is also the commitment factor involved. Am I committed enough to be a true guardian to a child for the rest of their life? Of course I would like to think so and I am certain that I would be, but given my track record for relationships it doesn't look good does it? Being a God parent is something I have always understood to be a life time commitment, not something you can walk away from (after a bond has been formed with the child) simply because it doesn't suit you to be associated with them anymore. My integrity is making me challenge myself on these two points. Hopefully there will be a way around the first and frankly I want to conquer the second as well so perhaps we can coin a new phrase or go through a naming ceremony and not a christening.

2. I was involved in a heated conversation as to whether national service should be re-introduced for some of the young men who seem to have nothing better to do than attack innocent people of carry out other crimes against their fellow beings.

"A stretch in the army would give them discipline!" was one often used phrase, as was "If they want to fight send them to Afghanistan where they can fight for us and not against us!".

I had to disagree - certainly with the second one. The young men and women who are serving their country in one war zone or another are doing so because they have the courage to volunteer to do so, they have been described as the bravest of the brave and I for one am not going to argue with that. Those young people who seem to think it is perfectly ok to go out and beat someone half (or all too often completely) to death are cowards who would run a mile if faced with a situation where they were on their own. Most media reports start with 'a group of youths' or 'a gang or teenagers' etc. Rarely, if ever, do you see 'one person on their own beat up a pensioner'. Like most bullies these people would shit themselves if they were faced with a one-to-one situation. No, national service is not the thing to do with these cowards, it would spoil a great army.

3. I wasn't going to comment on Dawn French's whining remarks in the Daily Telegraph about how telling fat jokes should be banned.

"It is no more acceptable to make a fat joke than it is to make a gay joke," she told Mandrake at the London Evening Standard Theatre Awards, at the Royal Opera House. "People need to learn to take everyone as they are." French said her weight had not helped her career but added, "It certainly hasn't hindered me!"

This is the woman whose autobiography is called Dear Fatty and who has made a career out of advertising chocolate oranges and glamorising obesity. She famously played a woman vicar obsessed with chocolate and she also once said "There are two types of women, those who like chocolate and complete bitches!". Making a joke about fat people is not a pleasant thing to do, but making a living out of them and then complaining about it is a bit rich. I wasn't going to comment...but I guess I just did.

^ menu

Something for nothing

Following the huge success of the two free speaker development days I delivered in October and November watch out for a series of free 'stuff days' coming next year. We intend to follow the same model of hiring a hotel room, sharing the cost between those who attend and then sharing anything and everything we have to share. It's going to be a blast.

^ menu

What do I know now that I didn't know a month ago?

Leaving your body to medical science is not that easy!

Oxford has a football team!

Some web design companies actually take people's money and do little or nothing in return.

^ menu

Challenging your thinking

Finding your purpose.
Some time ago someone sent my Mum a letter saying some amazing things about something my Dad had done for them. In retrospect that letter probably outlined what my Dad's purpose was, at least for the final years of his life anyway. Sadly though my guess is that Dad never even realised that what he had done for this lady was as amazing as it turned out to be, he just did it because he wanted to. Most people aren't altogether certain why they are here or why they do what they do, they never discover what their purpose is. This doesn't make them any worse a person, it doesn't mean that they never give everything to what they are doing. But if we know WHY we are doing something it might just help us to find that peace that so many people seek.

A purpose describes why we are here, why we do what we do and what we want to be remembered for. The lady who gave my Mum the letter about Dad would never forget what he did for her and my guess is that she will always remember him in a positive light. Your purpose is your inspiration, it is the force that leads you to realising your dreams and it ultimately might even shape your destiny.

If (like most people) you don't know what your purpose is why not, for the next twelve months at least, make one up. Decide what you want to achieve in the next year and make that your purpose. Once you know what it is you are going to do next year you will always have a reason for getting out of bed and for doing whatever it is you are doing. Decide to at least make an effort to have a positive impact on everyone you meet next year and then ask yourself what you would like those people to say about you in December 2010. What if...just what if... your purpose was to have everyone who meets you next year happy that they did, would it change the way you treat people?

If you need some help to find your purpose come along to one of my open programmes next year. You won't have a life's purpose or a series of permanent values to aspire to after just a few hours but you will at least be closer to knowing why it is you are here.

Midday moments.
During one of my sessions with my homeless friends we were discussing cause and effect, the fact that everything that happens to us (the effect) is in some way influenced by our own actions or beliefs (the cause.) I was explaining how we don't have to live our life all in one go, we can break it down into compartments. Anything that has happened...has happened, it is gone, done with, resigned to history. Our past does not have to determine our future.

We discussed how we could draw a line and say everything that side of the line is who I WAS and everything the other side is who I will BECOME and that we could actually choose who we become from this point. At this point the time was 11.50 am. I pointed out that we could use twelve noon 'today' as a changing point, we could simply decide that everything before 12 noon today was who I was and everything after is who I will become.

As I was leaving one of the guys stopped me and told me that he had decided who he wanted to become following his "Midday moment" and to be honest I stopped in my tracks. "Midday moments" – what an amazing way of looking at life and our actions or outcomes. What if we all had "Midday moments" when everything that happened before this point was who you were and everything after was who you will become. It turns out that it doesn't even have to be noon, it can be any time of the day or night. From now on though, for me at least, the time when I decide I want to change my mood, my attitude or my mind will always forever be known as "midday moments" the change point between who I was and who I will become.

^ menu

Achievements Inventory

The How to take life by the throat and say "I'm not done yet" open programme and 1-2-1 coaching programme is now up and running!

IMy diary tells me that I am at least assured of reaching my 11th Anniversary as a self-employed speaker in June 2010!

^ menu

Feedback

2009 has been an interesting year for feedback. It has fluctuated between brilliant to someone wishing me a slow and painful death (seriously) Quote of the year though goes to the person who wrote "I have decided not to comment on your pathetic ramblings..." (er...you just did !) and then proceeded to use more than 300 words to tell me why.

Funniest comes from the young man who heard me speak at his school and sent the following... "Thanks for coming into school to speak to us you were really funny and I now have some goals for my future. But my maths teacher isn't speaking to me now because I said to her "X + Y = who cares?"

My feedback from the universe has been largely positive this year though and as a result it has allowed me to enjoy at least another year of great choices. I have met some amazing people and created some fantastic friendships.

Whether you choose to give positive feedback or not I still appreciate the fact that to give any at all at least you have to do me the honour of reading my ramblings and for that I am grateful. Any feedback is always welcome and appreciated. I look forward to hearing from you next year.

^ menu

Paying it Forward

The Confident Club (www.confidentclub.com) is a group of my speaking colleagues who get together every year to give you a boost into the coming twelve months. The 2010 event will take place at the Mere Golf and Country Club in Cheshire on Friday 15th January.

If you wanted to book Steve McDermott, Paul McGee, Phil Hesketh and Dave Thomas you would not see a great deal of change from 15 grand but you can spend the day with all four of these Internationally renowned speakers for just £195 + VAT

The guys will share their thoughts on how to sell more stuff, how to use NLP, how to build more confidence and even how to remember everything you used to forget (Dave is a bit of a memory guru) throughout the day. This would be an amazing Christmas present for someone you love or for someone who keeps forgetting where their keys are.

For more information email Carol at the Confident Club

^ menu

A question for discussion.

If I don't believe in God can I contest a decision that a tree falling on my car is an act of God? And if you do believe that God exists and therefore everything is an act of God why do you have insurance?

^ menu

Personal Reflection

1. This integrity lark can be a pain sometimes. I have been asked to be a God Father to a new born in the family and I have to ask for time to think about it. Why? Simple, I don't believe in God and although it is only a few words that I have to say in the church it still doesn't fit with where I am with regards to living by my values. There is also the commitment factor involved. Am I committed enough to be a true guardian to a child for the rest of their life? Of course I would like to think so and I am certain that I would be, but given my track record for relationships it doesn't look good does it? Being a God parent is something I have always understood to be a life time commitment, not something you can walk away from (after a bond has been formed with the child) simply because it doesn't suit you to be associated with them anymore. My integrity is making me challenge myself on these two points. Hopefully there will be a way around the first and frankly I want to conquer the second as well so perhaps we can coin a new phrase or go through a naming ceremony and not a christening.

2. I was involved in a heated conversation as to whether national service should be re-introduced for some of the young men who seem to have nothing better to do than attack innocent people of carry out other crimes against their fellow beings.

"A stretch in the army would give them discipline!" was one often used phrase, as was "If they want to fight send them to Afghanistan where they can fight for us and not against us!".

I had to disagree - certainly with the second one. The young men and women who are serving their country in one war zone or another are doing so because they have the courage to volunteer to do so, they have been described as the bravest of the brave and I for one am not going to argue with that. Those young people who seem to think it is perfectly ok to go out and beat someone half (or all too often completely) to death are cowards who would run a mile if faced with a situation where they were on their own. Most media reports start with 'a group of youths' or 'a gang or teenagers' etc. Rarely, if ever, do you see 'one person on their own beat up a pensioner'. Like most bullies these people would shit themselves if they were faced with a one-to-one situation. No, national service is not the thing to do with these cowards, it would spoil a great army.

3. I wasn't going to comment on Dawn French's whining remarks in the Daily Telegraph about how telling fat jokes should be banned.

"It is no more acceptable to make a fat joke than it is to make a gay joke," she told Mandrake at the London Evening Standard Theatre Awards, at the Royal Opera House. "People need to learn to take everyone as they are." French said her weight had not helped her career but added, "It certainly hasn't hindered me!"

This is the woman whose autobiography is called Dear Fatty and who has made a career out of advertising chocolate oranges and glamorising obesity. She famously played a woman vicar obsessed with chocolate and she also once said "There are two types of women, those who like chocolate and complete bitches!". Making a joke about fat people is not a pleasant thing to do, but making a living out of them and then complaining about it is a bit rich. I wasn't going to comment...but I guess I just did.

^ menu

Something for nothing

Following the huge success of the two free speaker development days I delivered in October and November watch out for a series of free 'stuff days' coming next year. We intend to follow the same model of hiring a hotel room, sharing the cost between those who attend and then sharing anything and everything we have to share. It's going to be a blast.

^ menu

What do I know now that I didn't know a month ago?

Leaving your body to medical science is not that easy!

Oxford has a football team!

Some web design companies actually take people's money and do little or nothing in return.

^ menu

Challenging your thinking

Finding your purpose.
Some time ago someone sent my Mum a letter saying some amazing things about something my Dad had done for them. In retrospect that letter probably outlined what my Dad's purpose was, at least for the final years of his life anyway. Sadly though my guess is that Dad never even realised that what he had done for this lady was as amazing as it turned out to be, he just did it because he wanted to. Most people aren't altogether certain why they are here or why they do what they do, they never discover what their purpose is. This doesn't make them any worse a person, it doesn't mean that they never give everything to what they are doing. But if we know WHY we are doing something it might just help us to find that peace that so many people seek.

A purpose describes why we are here, why we do what we do and what we want to be remembered for. The lady who gave my Mum the letter about Dad would never forget what he did for her and my guess is that she will always remember him in a positive light. Your purpose is your inspiration, it is the force that leads you to realising your dreams and it ultimately might even shape your destiny.

If (like most people) you don't know what your purpose is why not, for the next twelve months at least, make one up. Decide what you want to achieve in the next year and make that your purpose. Once you know what it is you are going to do next year you will always have a reason for getting out of bed and for doing whatever it is you are doing. Decide to at least make an effort to have a positive impact on everyone you meet next year and then ask yourself what you would like those people to say about you in December 2010. What if...just what if... your purpose was to have everyone who meets you next year happy that they did, would it change the way you treat people?

If you need some help to find your purpose come along to one of my open programmes next year. You won't have a life's purpose or a series of permanent values to aspire to after just a few hours but you will at least be closer to knowing why it is you are here.

Midday moments.
During one of my sessions with my homeless friends we were discussing cause and effect, the fact that everything that happens to us (the effect) is in some way influenced by our own actions or beliefs (the cause.) I was explaining how we don't have to live our life all in one go, we can break it down into compartments. Anything that has happened...has happened, it is gone, done with, resigned to history. Our past does not have to determine our future.

We discussed how we could draw a line and say everything that side of the line is who I WAS and everything the other side is who I will BECOME and that we could actually choose who we become from this point. At this point the time was 11.50 am. I pointed out that we could use twelve noon 'today' as a changing point, we could simply decide that everything before 12 noon today was who I was and everything after is who I will become.

As I was leaving one of the guys stopped me and told me that he had decided who he wanted to become following his "Midday moment" and to be honest I stopped in my tracks. "Midday moments" – what an amazing way of looking at life and our actions or outcomes. What if we all had "Midday moments" when everything that happened before this point was who you were and everything after was who you will become. It turns out that it doesn't even have to be noon, it can be any time of the day or night. From now on though, for me at least, the time when I decide I want to change my mood, my attitude or my mind will always forever be known as "midday moments" the change point between who I was and who I will become.

^ menu

Achievements Inventory

The How to take life by the throat and say "I'm not done yet" open programme and 1-2-1 coaching programme is now up and running!

IMy diary tells me that I am at least assured of reaching my 11th Anniversary as a self-employed speaker in June 2010!

^ menu

Feedback

2009 has been an interesting year for feedback. It has fluctuated between brilliant to someone wishing me a slow and painful death (seriously) Quote of the year though goes to the person who wrote "I have decided not to comment on your pathetic ramblings..." (er...you just did !) and then proceeded to use more than 300 words to tell me why.

Funniest comes from the young man who heard me speak at his school and sent the following... "Thanks for coming into school to speak to us you were really funny and I now have some goals for my future. But my maths teacher isn't speaking to me now because I said to her "X + Y = who cares?"

My feedback from the universe has been largely positive this year though and as a result it has allowed me to enjoy at least another year of great choices. I have met some amazing people and created some fantastic friendships.

Whether you choose to give positive feedback or not I still appreciate the fact that to give any at all at least you have to do me the honour of reading my ramblings and for that I am grateful. Any feedback is always welcome and appreciated. I look forward to hearing from you next year.

^ menu

Paying it Forward

The Confident Club (www.confidentclub.com) is a group of my speaking colleagues who get together every year to give you a boost into the coming twelve months. The 2010 event will take place at the Mere Golf and Country Club in Cheshire on Friday 15th January.

If you wanted to book Steve McDermott, Paul McGee, Phil Hesketh and Dave Thomas you would not see a great deal of change from 15 grand but you can spend the day with all four of these Internationally renowned speakers for just £195 + VAT

The guys will share their thoughts on how to sell more stuff, how to use NLP, how to build more confidence and even how to remember everything you used to forget (Dave is a bit of a memory guru) throughout the day. This would be an amazing Christmas present for someone you love or for someone who keeps forgetting where their keys are.

For more information email Carol at the Confident Club

^ menu

A question for discussion.

If I don't believe in God can I contest a decision that a tree falling on my car is an act of God? And if you do believe that God exists and therefore everything is an act of God why do you have insurance?

^ menu